My Fault

I am a class topper. No arrogance. No showing off. Just an experience. I get good grades in Maths . And yet I am not taking it in 11th. And thats my biggest fault.

Because:

a) I am a 15 year old

b) I am 15 yrs old 1 month and 5 days.

c) I am apparently not old enough to make my own decisions except my timetable for the pre boards

d) I get good grades in Maths

e) I am a good student overall and get good often written on my nb with red (just this year its a remark on Microsoft Teams)

f) I am taking Commerce.

So no reason I shouldn’t be taking Maths right? Well I had one simple reason: I liked Legal Studies more. That doesn’t mean I hate or score less in Maths. What it does mean is that I can’t get admission in DU under Commerce degrees. And the only more stressful fact than this is that you need more than 99% in the best of four for admission in LSSR( i forgot the exact percentage shayad 100 tha sorry I am too lazy and especially amused to check up) .

Okay so till now I was not a topic of discussion among the 4 log kya kahenge . And guess what I have been included in that. Obviously a top scorer decided to take Commerce( Yes I Didn’t Take Science), decided she didn’t want to be a doctor in AIMS or a scientist in NASA and along with doing that I have left the subject of the millenium Maths out.

So yes I proudly welcome myself as a member of the 4 log kya kahenge hot gossip. And guess what I am proud of that( though I have already mentioned that) . Guptaji ki beti finally bigad gayi by not taking up maths.

For those who think that I am exaggerating, I have people come to talk to me and convince me to not take this hopeless decision which is going to destroy my career, my life, my reputation and my parents’ reputation. 4 log kya kahenge!!!!

And right now none of my teachers know of my decision. Lets see what their reaction will be. But back to the point. People with whom I have never had a meaningful conversation about even my periods or my teenage crush sat with me and told me how I was making a mistake by NOT TAKING UP MATHEMATICS.

Because again I get good grades and I need a good salary which I will not get as I am not taking up maths. And my reputation- well I have already lost it since I didn’t take Science. Okay so a nerd has lost her reputation other than just being somehow uncool. Interesting!

So I miss out on a good education hence a good job a good salary a good marriage a good life etc. Etc. Etc.

But what about everyone else who have lost their capacity to apparently mind their own business and tell me that I am destroying my life. Cause P.S. my life was already destroyed like all of you when I was born in this society. I am just trying to better it by doing what I want.

So people, small issue, but it should have a big discussion because it should. I am ambitious. I want money and I am not shamed to admit it. But I want a happy life where even if I have regrets its about the choices I took. And 4 logon ko topics dene mein thoda toh mazza aata hai.

So yes I have researched and made this decision very carefully examing all possible outcomes. Baaki kya outcome hoga kuch pata nahi because that is life.

Just needed to share this personal experience. Lately a lot of my blogs revolve around subjects, online classes, exam stress and a student’s deepest fear a.k.a Boards. But Atleast I have somewhere to let it out unlike many others……

And that’s good because now slowly and slowly life will start again….and this time more difficult than ever. But I guess I have cricket, blogging, friends amd family. And that’s all that matters.

Okay thoda zyaada philosophical ho gaya. But please lets remove the virus from this world. No I am not talking about Covid-19( yes that needs to be removed ASAP lets just pray and wear masks) . Here I actually talked about the virus from 3 idiots. Lets never let the Rancho in all of us die.

Before ending,

4 log kya kahenge bahut soch liya,

Kyonki zindagi 4 baar nahi milegi.

( I know that’s lame but couldn’t help writing that)

#LoveAndPeace

5 reasons given to girls

Okay are you a girl? And even if you are not I am sure you would have heard a lot of pathetic, lame and not to mention what’s the word yah patriarchal excuses or reasons given to stop our promotions or to tell us that we can’t be successful . Because obviously we need to be the woman behind the success of the successful man. And yes that dialogue is not romantic.

And yes it also includes reasons for a sexual assualt case . Or for something which is as simply complicated as emotions.

Okay so here are the 5 reasons:

1. “She is getting married”

Okay … she is getting married. So she will take months and months to plan the wedding then will take time to settle in her new life and finally she will get pregnant. Till the time she returns she will probably 5 years older and will give 5 times the less time she could devote earlier. Yah after marriage girls change right…they become all romantic and useless

And yes let’s forget about the time that you asked your own daughter in law to take a sabbatical cause hypocrisy is in 99% of the human population and the rest 1% I have not included cause atleast they admit that they are hypocrites and maybe that is the start of the fixing of the problem.

2. “Uske bas ka nahi”

Well thats probably a very nonsensical and dismotivating thing to be saying keeping the whole baggage of misogyny aside. But when you say that to a person because of her gender dude you are threatened. You are threatened of the fact that she can go beyond you . That a girl can go beyond you. And this is a statement given by women as well against the same gender.

Okay uske bas ka nahi sports khelna. Uska bas nahi Director ki position sambhalna. Uske bas ka hai bas subah 5 baje uthna, poore ghar ka kaam karna, bacchon ko uthana, ready karna, school bhejna, ghar sambhalna, bacche aye unha sambhalna, hw karana, , dinner banana, kapdr dhona , bacchon ko sulana, husband ka wait karna etc. etc. etc.

But sorry if women can do this work for so many years and still continue doing it with many of them even working outside, dude we can do anything and that includes dealing with you and your chauvinist jokes.

3. “She asked for it”

Yah she asked for rape. For molestation. For sexual assault.

A crop top means she asked for it. A late night means she asked for it. Even a slap at you because you eve teased her is a sign. What next? Hair on our head.I mean aise aise signs launch karte ho. Choti se bacchi ka religion is a sign.

Lets just change the meaning of it cause it will sound much better and infact can sound much better than rape.

It should mean Respect. Consent. Will. Love…..

She can walk naked on the road but nobody has the right to violate her body. Or even touch her without her permission . Period. Well the next one is related to this.

4. “Are you PMSing/ Are you like having them?”

Them because apparently saying the word period in public is a sin. You know even I have had times when I can’t do yoga cause I am on my periods and then I have to lie to my school mates that I have a stomach ache. And even though I want to change that sometime it kinds of scares me on how would others react especially because this thing has been fed to me since I started with the monthly cycle in 6th but yes I promise not to be a hypocrite and will change.

But back to it. Yes PMS causes mood swings. But its not a cause for all our emotions and feelings. Unlike chauvinism which is a reason for all your joblessness and hatred. Because sometimes we shout because we are fed up off your nonsensical remarks on everything from our weight to our career. And sometimes just because we have seen a lizard on our wall.

5. “Yaar kuch toh difference hota hai naa ladka-ladki mein

First of all thanks for telling me that we do we do have certain differences between males and females. But no thanks for applying in situations where women and their bodies will benefit. Like period leaves….

But yeah definitely everyone has the time in the world to use this line to dismotivate, discourage and basically bring down girls cause there is this particular thing called ego which cannot handle that a particular gender can rise.. Actually after putting it in that way I realized that patriarchy is a really funny concept. Kyonki it has no basis yeh it has existed since times immemorial.

So yes there are biological differences dude. We all get it. But come on stop using it an excuse for bringing down women. Because these biological differences do not mean that we don’t have the capability to work. Aisa kahi nahi likha. So move on.

So yes there are 5 reasons given to women to stop them from living their life.

And as ridiculous as they sound, they are often used.

But actions speak more than words.

Hence you use words and we will use our actions……

So girls and boys who want to prove these reasons wrong(not that they already aren’t),

How’s the josh??

Marks! Marks!! And more marks!!

Okay before starting I received my stream allocation form for my higher secondary. Yah that moment!!! The moment when you think you can remove your most disliked subjects, get pressurized into taking something you dislike or simply get panicked.

But after seeing the form I realized one thing. This might be the 21st century par hum aaj tak badle nahi. Hum abhi bhi wahi hai.

100 wale science lo, 60 wale arts, interest and liking and choice ko phekdo dustbin mein kyonki hum aage nahi badne wale.

We are still in that time. Like i feel ashamed. Social discrimination toh tha hee. Arts wale have already been branded nalayak and science wale have been told that now they have been upgraded . Like they have gone to a pressure factory of level higher than that of 10th. Commerce choosers like me are basically beech ke bichu.

You know my whole excitement on seeing the form died when I saw mentioned on top ” Subject to the results of the board examination”. Terms and Conditions Applied. Give two preferences because if you have 70 and want Science you are not eligible dude. Sapna physicist banne ka ho sakta hai, but banna tumhe history teacher hee hoga and vice versa if you have got 90 marks.

I personally was into such a big dilemna regarding the choice between Legal Studies and Mathematics. And finally I went with Legal Studies… thereby disqualifing any admission in DU if I want to continue with commerce. But then that if was not really worth more than my liking for Law atleast right now. So i took the plunge. And yes I am still confused about my career. Guess confusion is my biggest trait especially as a true Libran and teenager.

And I know that this decision is unacceptable to the societal norms. And yes I have already been advised regarding that.

Okay now back to the original topic. I don’t know how and when will the new Education policy been implemented. I just hope it comes soon and better.

Like social discrimination ka toh pata tha but I was unaware of the fact that schools can actually stop their students in taking a stream of their choice on the basis of marks….. Wow I am impressed by the level of pressure and discrimination!!!!!! All those chapters in political science about Gender, religion, caste, Fundamental rights are waste cause we have another form of discrimination !!!! KUDOS

I wait for a day when subjects will be chosen on the basis of likes, dislikes and interests and not on the basis of marks, Pinky aunty ka baccha yeh kar raha hai and log kya kahenge.

Kyonki

“Babumoshai, zindagi badi honi chahiye, lambi nahi.”

An open conversation between Indian Journalists

Okay so this conservation means to describe the conservation between journalists who have apparently forgotten the ethics of a journalist or actually ignore them , umm run behind TRP ( as fast as Simran running behind the train Raj is on) and have made all journalists seem like a puppet in the public eye.

Okay so lets start and again I don’t mean to hurt the sentiments of journalists who actually believe in doing their job. Its for the people who are running a circus in the name of media houses and are completely legalizing bigotry and sexism……

Okay so this time I am finally starting.

Senior Journalist(SJ) and Junior one(JJ)

SJ: What is this news that you have given me?

JJ: well there has been a flood in

SJ: yah i saw but where is the real news?

JJ: umm this is real news. 70 people died and

SJ: yah i will post a RIP on that thanks for reminding but come on we need to have a solid topic for debate.

JJ: Yah so we can talk to the authorities responsible and politicians

SJ: wait a minute uss state mein toh xyz party hai naa( xyz refers to the party the media house is affiliated to means bought by)

JJ: yah, so

SJ: rule 1: We are only meant to be showing news in favour of xyz. Come on

And rule 2: we need gossip. Like get me the schedule of a bollywood starkid or actually what is better is dig up some 100 years old report of corruption regarding the opposite party. And then lets have a debate.

JJ: oh okay and what about the flood

SJ: yah we will announce them when we announce the 60 headlines at 6 o clock today naa

JJ: okay ill just research

SJ: yah do it quick and please ask someone to get a star kid’s lunch menu for today or you can also schedule and interview maybe for the weekend.

JJ: okay so there is a guy who has been working for rehabilating human trafficking victims maybe

SJ:arey i meant someone with an obnoxious agenda with suits ours, who can give lots and lots of trp and will put a lot of efforts in causing cardiac diseases as well as defects to the ears of our viewers and yeah definitely contribute to the cause of noise pollution if that was not obvious. And yes most important quality: He/she should make absolutely no sense and yes definitely be a twitter troll.

JJ: Oh okay… will find one and anything else.

SJ: Yah please remind me to put the RIP post . Umm and yes we also have a sports segment coming up. So anything about that

JJ: yes we have this whole domestic tournament

SJ: wait wait. Oh God I have to teach you everything . Just get some information about any cricketer and his engagement . We will post that or any issue between a sportsman and his wife. What about the one going through divorce kya naam tha?

JJ: Okay ill check….

Toh ek seek mili humein

Sab ganda hai par dhandha hai yeh,

Journalism has been made a circus… We have indian serials’ villains as news anchors….. and made news channels a puppet show…

Btw why dont they include sensationalism in mass communication . Koi kaam toh dhang se karle atleast humare tv vamps!

I got too involved in the Sushant case not realising that i was actually indulging in the villlification of someone and that i was being misogynist something i hate about the whole society…. I don’t know what has happened and I hope justice prevails… but its time that we as viewers and the media realised that truth should not be pleasing to hear. It should simply be the truth.

Dont know till when this bigotry, misogyny and corruption will prevail,

Ab kya kare,

Sach aur pesa mein humesha pesa jeet ta hai( btw this was a awfully twisted version of the awfully misogynistic dialogue of SKTKS)

His only fault.

His only fault was that he felt,

He had emotions , he had love, he had tenderness,

In a place where he was supposed to be “manly”,

His only fault was that he cried,

Among people who laughed at him for expressing himself,

His only fault was that he loved the colour pink,

And that was why he was called a girl,

His only fault was that he didn’t want much money,

In a society where he was supposed to be the man of the house.

His only fault was that he didn’t want to be an ATM,

In a place where marriage proposals queued up infront of the largest one,

His only fault was that he loved dancing,

In a place where he was supposed to be a state level cricketer,

His only fault was that he married ,

He married someone the society chose for him,

His only fault if it can be said that it was his fault was that the girl misused the same laws that were meant to protect her,

That his life became an irony and a web of lies from where he couldn’t come out,

So when the first dowry case was registered ,

Disregarding the fact that he didn’t even take a rupee from the girl’s family,

When the police arrested him for domestic violence,

Despite him having a slap on his face from the girl he was supposed to spend his whole life with,

He was speechless,

Cause the red mark on his face couldn’t outweigh the false bruises on his life’s biggest irony and biggest defeat , his wife,

He was thrown out of his rented appartment,

Out of the society,

Who neglected true cases and punished the accused in false ones because the accused couldn’t do anything,

He was speechless,

Not that he was allowed to speak up since the starting,

But because he didn’t know what to do,

He had the pressure of earning those rupees,

Sustaining the household,

Become the man of the house,

And now this false case had pushed him into a zone from which return was impossible,

He couldn’t cry because he was forced not to cry,

He couldn’t feel pain because he was supposed to be painless,

He was supposed to be painless till he didn’t jump off from the roof of that building,

A building where he spent those days with his college friends,

Drinking and gossiping,

Those good memories were forced out and only bad ones remained,

And so when he took that step every good thing had vanished.

He died.

Like that girl’s conscience had died. The only difference was that her conscience had been choked by herself while he chose to jump off from the nightmare he was supposed to call life.

Stop misusing laws meant to protect us. Cause it destroys the lives of the people you accuse and shames the true victims of such crimes as no one believes them.

The laws are biased to counter the society’s bias .

Stop misusing them.

#JeeyoAurJeeneDo

Zindagiyaan barbaad mat karo.

Kyonki Ek jhoote case se barbaadi tum kya jaano.

Disney-Maybe Not So Romantic

Okay so as a young girl I have watched a lot of Disney Princess Movies( why have I said girl because in our society yeh saari movies sirf girls ki dekhne ki liye hoti hai kher ill talk about this patriarchy with movies, toys and kinderjoys later).

But well I will talk about some wrong notions taught by these disney princesses to young children.

Okay without any further ado, shuru karte hai:

1. Snow White: Now I am first going to talk about a character from a famous book and movie which is also named on the character itself basically just furthering the racial stereotype associated with dark skin. Snow white is a girl who has achieved nothing in life. Okay yes she has a pretty bad past attached to her. Yah obviously when you have a step mom with an inferiority complex and an all truthful mirror whose powers are used only for answering the question’ mirror mirror on the wall who is the fairest of all'( racism alert) yah I pretty much get it.

But why have i said that she has achieved nothing. Its because even though she is a dumb young girl( she keeps on taking stupid things from strangers despite many warnings) she has been shown as amazing and beautiful and no guesses why because she is as fair as snow. There are tons of other problems I have as well but that I will talk about in other points.

2. Reinforcing the Abla Naari Concept:

Well these movies have been instrumental in reinforcing the concept that women need men for almost everything. From fighting with the evil step mother from rescuing them from evil uncles women need men to rescue them. Come on a flying carpet with a genie and rescue women. And yes I know that in the past years few movies have come out where this all this has changed and women have been showed capable of fighting and chalo thats good. But still what damage these movies have caused can’t be reversed like Glow and Lovely can’t reverse the damage caused by Fair and Lovely.

Please this whole concept of prince charming is outdated and silly. Yes it is good having someone stand beside you and support you regardless of gender but this whole concept of the prince fighting with dragons for the princess is not romantic..its silly.

3. The ideal Prince Charming:

Well along with reducing girls to abla naaris, these movies have also instilled in boys a need to be muscular, physically strong and protective for their love interest. Nothing wrong with that but its not necessary to be like that.

An ideal prince charming has been made strong and the one who fights with the monster for the princess. He is exceptionally good at sword fighting and horse riding. Basically the western version of mard ko dard nahi hota.

Boys its okay if you are not like them. You can be a different prince charming that is if you want to be one.

4. Reinforcing the step mother stereotype: well in Snow White, the step mother as I have already talked about is a western and more dangerous version of the campaigners of fair and Lovely ads. But yes she does go to the limit of trying to kill the maiden in distress and actually goes to the extent of asking her heart as proof of murder. Do you hear that law courts? Anyways she is dangerous, evil, vain and mad all 4 qualities that an ideal step mom should have, isn’t it?

And lets jump on to Cinderella where again the evil step mom and sisters torture the poor maiden and give her this weird name. She then goes to the ball falls in love with a guy who cannot recognise her as her dress gets changed and then comes back home to the same torture. Like basically step moms are evil. They are vain and they torture. And btw I was kidding.

Okay so these are some things I don’t like about Disney movies…… there are some that I do like like selflessness, going by natural instincts etc. Etc. But yah had to point out these flaws as a blogger who loves this job……

Before ending,

Just 2 advices,

1. Don’t fall into this seemingly romantic but flawed idea of romance

And

2. Don’t take apples from strangers that too when you live in a forest only inhabited by wild animals and seven dwarfs.. yah.

Its as dumb as this tweet

What to do in these Bollywood situations?

Unreal. Imaginary. Kalpanik. Not true. Lie. Idiotic. Nonsense. Regressive

One word for all of these: Bollywood.

Okay going exactly by the name of my blog, I am going to talk about what should you do if you were stuck in these bollywood filmy sequences.

1. DDLJ: Ek hindustani ladki ki izzat:

Well I have already talked about ek hindustani ladki ki evergreen izzat ( basically virginity but you can’t say that word loud in public, can you) in

https://lavanyaguptablogs.home.blog/2020/10/11/ek-hindustani-ladki-ki-evergreen-izzat/

So now lets get back to the scene. If anyday you wake up in hangover and a boy comes and pretends that you had sex with him and then says this amazingly obnoxious and heart wrenching dialogue, please don’t forget to tell him how big a creep is. Try to escape from him asap . And obviously now most of us have a phone please don’t even hesitate calling any close contact for help( not that you wouldn’t have last day but just reminding). And yes please give him a reality check on how he has no knowledge about female sexuality and virginity and how gravely misogynistic he is (even if he is SRK).

Please girls do that. And don’t be Simran. Its neither romantic nor cute. Its plain idiotic and yah you can add regressive.

2. Kuch Kuch Hota Hai Climax

First of all, don’t marry for the sake of marrying especially when your own mother is saying that you need love to make a home i mean make a marriage happy. Come on yaar, then also you are marrying. Leave it..

Now if you have reached that situation and still want to marry because marriage karne ke alaava you know nothing , then atleast choose the right guy bro.

Mean you have a boy called Rahul whom you claimed to love. Okay the probably only good quality about him is that ummm lemme think forget it. Like he stereotypes you, laughs at you when you wear dresses and makes you the second option in his life. He choses you because Tina is not there in his life anymore.

And on the other side Aman. He is sweet, caring, accepts you the way you are and loves you from the start, so much so that he asks you to marry Rahul cause apparently you are in love with him. Okay love shouldn’t be judged .Love is love. But are you sure that you want to spend a whole lifetime with a person who likes you only when you have 2 kg of makeup, 5 kg of jewels and a saree draped around you? I Mean seriously.

Pyaar dosti hai.. lekin pyaar respect nahi. Kya double standards khel gaye bro.

3. Dabang: Pyaar se keh rahe hai rakh lo, warna thappad maar ke bhi de sakte hai

First of all, tell him clearly that if he a policeman he is not supposed to treat her in this manner. Warna usi ke police station mein usi ke against FIR karoongi.

Also, tell him clearly that he can keep his money to himself. Woh belt ka stupid sa step karke, logon pe goli chalake and stupid se patriarchal dialogues maarke woh usi naa hee dara sakta hai aur naa hee uske apni beewi bana sakta hai.

And btw this is what actually happens. Aakhir sonakshi sinha ka launch kiya hai why will she argue? Haan correct hai.

4. Kabir Singh: Cheek kiss

Honeslty I haven’t seen this film. I just went to my Netflix Account( actually the one of my parents) and viewed this particular scene obviously just to bash it.

Okay so the guy kisses her on the cheek without asking her permission shamelessly cause he thinks that the kiss is his right. And the girl takes it. Well girls don’t take it.

Honestly I would really want to slap these people but the problem is that in the real world even though I hate to admit it it becomes problematic for these people who cannot handle rejection by a girl and then resort to violent crimes. And before anyone says that this is just a theory. Kabir Singh earned ₹379 crore according to Wikipedia and I guess that not everyone would have gone to the cinema hall to watch that particular scene.

Yah!!! So I would atleast advise the girls to tell him clearly that you are not interested, complain to your principal and also file a FIR .

Don’t become a cow for a monster. Its not worth it.

5. Kal Ho Naa Ho-Jab tak tum apna weight loss nahi karti tumhe koi ladka wadka nahi milne wala

Okay so there is a scene in which the lead character Naina tells her best friend Sweety that she will not get a boyfriend if she doesn’t lose weight. Thankfully Aman sitting at their side eavesdropping their conversation( well even that is invasion of privacy) tells her that she doesn’t need a boyfriend who can’t love her for how she is. And yes I am not going to talk about the way he ridiculously sets up with a guy .

But lets talk about how Naina who is teased by both Aman and Rohit for being boring and nerdy and not having a boyfriend should maybe understand Sweety who in fact is her best friend and the only one who doesn’t give her inferiority complexes. ( yah maybe she needed to live a bit but kahi baar invasion of privacy ho jaati thi by Aman)

Anyways so now if I was Sweety I would have broken my friendship with a girl who has these outdated definations of beauty and also tell her that she is overtly regressive and should definitely handle her own personal life rather than giving me stupid advices and making me feel inferior.

Okay so these are 5 scenes about which I have talked. Also just mentioning particularly out of nowhere that I saw Chalang and I just wanted to say that I felt Nushrat Bharucha’s character was treated as a trophy restoring the stereotype that women are trophies meant to be won. No we aren’t .

And yes before ending,

Filmein sirf teen wajah se chalti hai: misogyny, misogyny and misogyny.

#Justice For Aishwarya

Studying in LSR is a dream for many Indian children and their families. Well a girl was living it but yet she took her own life.

After the Pandemic, one of the biggest group affected has turned out to be students. Already facing a lot of pressure courtesy entrance exams and boards the pandemic has worsened the situation particularly for those coming from lesser priviledged families.

No digital devices. No network. People in India can’t afford 2 meals a day in normal circumstances . How will they afford all of the above?? Basically, education which was a luxury before the Pandemic has become a nightmare.

And in this journey of luxury to nightmare, Sonu Sood will be helping the students. In fact many will. But not the government.

The only conclusion I got was that that girl with a dream in her eye spending so many sleepless nights was not worth as much to anyone than agenda. Neither to me. Nor to you. Nor to anyone else.

We should be proud. Arey few months back we were going to war with our neighbour. But who cared about the condition of a young girl who was studying in one of the best institutes all over India yet could not attend her classes? Yet could not fulfill her dreams? Nobody cared.

Nobody cares now. A family lost their daughter. They had already taken their other daughter out of school to fund the elder daughter’s dreams. The worst part is that even though I have dreams none of them actually consists of getting an education because to someone like me its easily accessible from childhood.

3 time ka khana. An education. Some financial security. Some social security. And some dignity. Yeh basic hai. Basic. Par milti sab ko nahi.

All of us just know to do #…..LivesMatter. None of us know how to make a change and even if we do we will not make a change. Because # is only for followers. Actual life mein humse bada hypocrite koi nahi.

Education has become a nightmare. When will it become a basic right I don’t know. I have no clue.

Kyonki kya kare ab raja ka beta raja nahi banega, raja wahi banega jo haqdaar hoga only sounds good in bollywood movies, award shows and in school debates.

Stop saying these dialogues

Class 10th. The story starts. Covid Pandemic. Isolated at home. Upar se sone pe suhaga in the name of online classes. (I Know btw that I am privileged of getting the resources for online classes) .

And then we hear all these dialogues which are amazing in demotivating, discouraging and frustrating us and for me it’s particular a year of written pressure cause its 10th.

Lets start:

1. Its so easy for you: Most of the teachers and parents have used this dialogue atleast once. Now basically syllabus kam ho gaya . So we are lucky. Ghar pe baith kar padai so we are lucky.

At a time when people are talking about work from home pressure and how stressful it is, they themselves tell their own children and students about how easy it is.. Wow. Hume toh chod dete( oh I forgot children in India don’t go to school they go to pressure pumping units). And about the cutting of the syllabus, it has been done to ease the workload on the students due to the online classes and give schools more time to complete their syllabus not to pressurize students using yet another dramatic dialogue.

Aap log apne zamaane mein ek chote se bulb mein padte the, kitna door school jaate the, humara classroom hee computer ban gaya. Humari bhi struggle samjho.

And its frustrating. 3 cycles of tests and 2 cycles of pre board and finally the long awaited 4 log kya kahenge , unke liye marks laane wala boards. Its enough. Don’t frustrate us more.

2. Toh kya hua, ghar par hee toh ho

Because you are at home, you are idle. You have no work. You are useless. So why not use that time to do the exercises of a chapter you don’t like, infact hate? Do the work, scan the page, turn in, repeat. Repeat again till the time you become a professional photographer and scanner. And you tell one teacher, maam we have a lot of homework, please give us some more time, arey toh kya hua , ghar pe hee toh ho.

Ghar pe hee toh hai . Correct. But whether I want to use that extra time for sleeping, for enjoying or just for staring at a mosquito in my balcony that’s my choice. Stop burdening. And yes we are not idle. We have tutions . We have extra classes. We have self study. And we have homework.

3. Poora din kya karte rehto ho?

Related to the first one very closely, most people think that students do nothing at home . They are vele. Kuch nahi karte. Hnn hum kuch nahi karte. Bas pressure cooker mein pakte rehte hai and 4 logon ki baatein sunte rehte hai.

We have to carefully ignore unwanted advices and respond with that fake smile while our eyes are red with anger and our heads are bursting. Pata hai kitni mehnat hai.

And yes I had my ipl and t20 challenge matches . And people who will say ki yeh sab kyon dekh rahe the 10th hai you people are the biggest problem. Padai hee duniya mein sab kuch nahi. Uske aage bhi jeene do.( Btw my team MI won the final thats why I am a bit calmed down and this is my bit calmed down outburst)

4. Abhi pad lo bas

Abhi pad lo bas . Hearing that since the start. Abhi bas abhi. Hnn pehle pre mid ke liye padlo, phir mid ke liye, phir post mid ke liye bhi. Post mid khatam hote hee 10 din mein pehla pre board phir doora and phir boards. Bas abhi padlo. Bas abhi.

Its irritating……….(sorry for sounding like a rant)

5.Yeh tumhare C.V. pe lagega

10th ke marks C.V. pe. 10th ke marks se career . Daralo. Yeh dar accha hai. Pressure daalne ke liye. No more comments.

6. Bear it

Ok online classes no choice.

But why should we bear stupid comments like tum nalayak ho, sirf 97% , padte nahi tum, and the like as I have already said? Yeh pressure factories mein kyon rahe. Aur yeh kum syllabus wala dialogue kyon sune?

Why should we study without any break? Arey hum toh 10th hai humari toh chuttiyan vese bhi le lete hai. 10th hai kuch bhi kar sakto ho. Hum toh sirf bardaash hee kar sakta hai.

Brief summary. WE ARE FRUSTATED.

Teachers complain about not speaking in online classes and sleeping. Earlier yes it was fun but now it is because we are tired of studying and studying. Life mein aur kuch bacha nahi kya .

I dont mean to disrespect teachers. I know its tough for teachers as well. Really tough. And for others also but stop undermining difficulties faced by students as well.

Okay now I must return to marking dams on Indian political maps, drawing diagrams of convex lens and memorising volume of a hemisphere.

Bass abhi yahi dialogue sunna baaki reh gaya asli zindagi mein,

“Parampara, Pratishtha, Anushasan. Ye is gurukul ke teen stambh hai. Ye wo aadarsh hain jinse hum aapka aane waala kal banaate hain.”

Like take a chill pill.

What happened to the Hathras Case?

One day you woke up to hear a news about a young 19 yr old girl who was brutally raped and then killed. We were constantly hearing news about the government’s failed action etc. etc.

Within 2 days, something completely expected happens. Why expected? Cause what happens is a new or maybe an old Indian obsession-Politicization. Suddenly nobody cares about the rape and murder. Nobody cares about the rapes in UP. Neither in Rajasthan. In short nobody cares about the innocent lives that were lost to centuries old lust, ego, power and prejudice.

There are debates on news channels which people screaming, shouting, howling, abusing and contributing to the cause of noise pollution. Except facts everything is provided even from the side of the biased journalists. It becomes about who handles rape cases worser? BJP or Congress or XYZ party?

Woh bhi bas chala kuch dinon ke liye. Phir sab bhool gaye. Leftists got a new thing to criticise the government for their own new agendas. Rightists hushed the matter.

And to justify( if it can be) there is only one excuse. This is India. Yahaan yahi hota raha hai, hota hai aur hota rahega. Live with it. This expression of 3 words and 10 letters is the most irritating. Yahi hota rahega can also compete for this position.

What can we expect in a nation where there are expections from everyone( i am seriously not ranting about that again) but politicians? What can we hope in a nation where we are forced to choose from the best of the worst in each election?

U.S.A. elections are being debated in India. Good they are. International issues should be discusses. But when will we talk about our condition . Wake up. Kamla Harris ki speeches sunke we retweet, we like , we comment and we share. Humare andar ka feminist aur Indian jaag uthta hai.

But when will the feminist and Indian no not even that , I would say the human inside us awake when we hear about a rape case in Hathras, in Unnao or maybe in a place whose name we haven’t even heard?

I wrote about this case in my blogs. Then I did not comment much about this case and even about the cases in Rajasthan because they were being politicised. But now they are suddenly out of the public eye.

But how did I forget? Yeh India hai. Files gayab kardena, scams kardena is only a TRP grab and a dicussion between a group of men drinking alcohol. Sorry my bad.

Yeh Naya Hindustan hai was last year’s hit dialogue. Maybe yes in our response to terrorism. But uske alaava kya badla ?

I will tell you. Zero. That was invented in India only. Utna hee badla.

We make Priyanka Reddy and Jyoti Singh Pandey as some form of heroes . But my question is did someone even give the choice to them of becoming heroes? Which girl wants to be raped to become a hero and have her hashtags on social media?

Again. Zero. 0

Just remember that at this moment a girl might be getting raped. A family might be getting humiliated. A file may be getting destroyed. But what will we do?

0

Because hum 0 karte the, 0 karte hai aur shayad 0 hee karenge.

5 Bollywood movies that are regressive

Well I know its a turbulent time going for the Bollywood industry and no I am not writing about that. I am just going to write about 5 Bollywood movies which are famous but are …..( guess what). Misogynist? Patriarchal? Misleading? Yes congrats you are correct(Virtual Hi-fi)

Okay so we grew up and in fact are growing up learning a new thing everyday in life( pretty philosophical I know) seeing bollywood movies. Atleast most of us I assume. Yah we do completely ignore messages in movies like Pink and Yuva and Queen and instead learn messages in the following movies:( so we are hypocrites as well)

1. Student of the Year

Okay so as a 15 year old teenager I have a lot of dreams for college life but seeing Student of the Year made me wonder whether I would be going into a college or a fashion show with expensive convertibles( we would be thrashed if we demanded this), bollywood award show costumes and lots of makeup not forgetting the fact that as a girl I would only have 3 jobs:

a. Dressing b. Crushing on boys c. Cat fighting with girls for my idiotic boyfriend who is himself flirting with these girls and treating me like garbage ( btw Aisa kuch nahi hone Wala)

Okay so the lead character Shanaya has no clue what she wants in life. Like the mature one wants to be the egoistic one’s father( only in career) and the egoistic one wants to be a rockstar with a large number of female fans. But Shanaya, she is a confused soul busy on making plans for bringing back her dumb boyfriend from the Kuch Kuch Hota Hai grown up girl with whom he is flirting.

She dances on a track in her boyfriend’s brother’s sangeet, flirts with the serious one and ignores the dumb one. Finally she falls in love with the serious one and marries him. Nobody knows what her career is and what her ambitions are. And what ambitions for a girl who wants to win a trophy to spite her friend who is 10 times more ambitious than her but not as popular because she wears shorts and has short hair I guess.(guess what she loses that trophy as well because she can’t keep her emotions in check). Yah and don’t forget she finally cheats her own boyfriend who was the dumb one with her current husband. Cool naa!!( btw 2nd part ke baare mein baath karne ki mere paas himmat nahi, and whosoever judges me for even watching it, I endured the torture to see Tara Sutaria whom I used to watch In sitcoms when i was small but yeah I didn’t waste money on the movie ticket for it)

2. Haseena Maan Jayegi

How to woo a girl’s heart according to Govinda movies?

1. Act like a blind man.

2. Follow her like a lusty stalker.

3. View her lustily when she is naked in front of you because she is fooled into believing you as blind.

4. Stalk , stalk and stalk.

5. Sing misogynistic songs. Finally you have the girl.

And sanjay dutt style simple hai, ghode pe aao ladki ko uthao and then confess your lust I mean love. Simple hai boss.

And these girls. Instead of dialing 100 they fall into these stalking tendencies. Modern abla naaries.These need men more than the Indian team needs Suryakumar Yadav.

3. Namastey London

Yeah okay Jasmeet urff Jazz is not completly faultless. She does cheat the innocent Arjun and runs away on her wedding . She has faults. But I have found few faults in her father .

One he might have settled in England but son in law must be Indian. This was pointed by his Indian son in law as well btw. Khud he drinks with his friends yah maybe not in a nightclub but in his home. But he does drink. Par beti nahi peeye. No no no. She mustn’t wear short dresses, shouldn’t drink , shouldn’t visit a nightclub and yeah definitely shouldn’t have an English boyfriend.

And again she shouldn’t get a choice to choose her own husband. Apna husband nahi choose karna chahiye. Ladki ko kesi choose karne de sakte hai yaar. Agar aage nikal gayi toh.

And because she exercises her freedom of choice, he conveniently blames this on her mother who blasts on him correctly but then instead of understanding his own faults, he asks her why is she getting angry. Yeah it is this idiotic.

4. Gully Boy

This might be a surprise for some. Well yes it was liberal in many thought. Like for the rap industry, for dreams , for journeys, and maybe for the concept of life itself.

Okay now the problem .Murad cheats on Safeena with Sky. Safeena on knowing this gets agitated and rightly so. Mere boyfriend ke saath gulu gulu karegi toh dhopungi naa usey. Haan very peacefully she breaks a bottle of alcohol on Sky’s head but Murad he is a man. He has no fault. Galti toh Sky ki hee hai. Matlab uskee bhi hai but to be honest Murad ke shayad ussey zyaada hai.

But what happens? Murad gets angry with her for her violent behaviour and breaks off though refusing Sky’s advances as well (thank god for that). And Safeena does the job of manofying him and also tries to bring him back by threatening him of a forced marriage with his friend who is scared of the thought of marrying Safeena. Key point:

Galti Murad kee ni, Sky kee hai,

Movie jo freedom ki baath kare usmein bhi misogyny hai.

5. Mujhse Shaadi Karogi

Okay what is love? Staring at a girl who lives infront of you and fall off the balcony in supposed awe. Then acting infront of the father , the daughter, the mother and even the cute pet dog. And spoiler alert: The guy who turns out to be the lead hero’s childhood bestie supposedly helps in setting up Salman Khan with Miss World by gazing at her lustily and passing lewd comments on her body.

There is also a scene where a woman comes to Salman Khan’s character for asking him to remove her husband from night shift( he had put him there because he had played a prank on him by making him stay awake for one whole night) because she wants to have sex with her husband . And he actually sends another man with her for the purpose. What a nice joke!!!!! What a comedic scene!!!!!

Claps!!!!! Claps!!! And more slow claps

And for those thinking how on Earth have I forgotten the epic romantic classic Kabir Singh. I have not. Its just that I have not even bothered watching this movie besides the fact that it is an 18+ movie. But yah I have heard that it should have won misogyny of the year award in the filmfare award show along with the best male performance. Those debates later.

Also I have talked about Kuch Kuch Hota in https://lavanyaguptablogs.home.blog/2020/09/27/from-bff-to-gf-of-a-patriarchal-bf/.

Before ending just one thing,

Bollywood,

Agar tum mein thodi si bhi sharm hai, toh palat palat palat aur badal badal badal.

Decoding indian parent dialogues

Are you an Indian child having typical desi parents? Then I assume that you would have heard atleast 90% of the following dialogues either for your rebellious sibling or for you if you are the rebellious one or if you have scored 93 percent. And yes this blog is not talking about all Indian parents . It is just talking about the section of parents who are busy in moulding and fitting their children by societal rules and regulations.

Okay, without any further ado let’s start:

1. “Kya ho gaya agar kam marks aa gaye ,Tujhe guard ki naukri par lagwa denge”

Pehli baath kam marks kitne honge? Chalo chodo lets not comment on that. Basically this is a dialogue used by Indian parents when they don’t want to shout but simply want to shoot an arrow in your heart by few words(which Indian parents excell at). So yeah guard bana denge, peon bana denge, maid bana denge suna padta hoga I am assuming.

2. “Tera kisi ke saath I mean kuch hai, I mean we are very open minded so you can tell us.

Basically even if you have nobody cares. This is just a way to tell you that tumhare liye ladka/ladki dekhna hum shuru kar chuke hai. Kal unse milne/woh tumse milne aa/jaa rahe hai.(This / demarcates the gender because ladke waale ladki ke ghar use dekhne jaate hai)

3. “Darwaza kyon band tha?”

Basically kissey chatting kar rahe the? Kissey baath kar rahe the? Phone pe kya dekh rahe the? Aur kyon lagado har question par. #Suspicious #Jasoosi( Indian parents are the best spies)

4. ” Accha tera friend ladka hai”

Because obviously ek ladka aur ladki kabhi dost nahi ho sakte. This is India my friend jahaan Maine Pyaar Kiya aur Hum Tum ke aise dialogues world i mean country famous hai.

5. “Tune apni yeh problem kisi se discuss toh nahi ki naa.”

Now basically what problems? For girls it could be menstruation related or breast related or any other such girl problem wale issues. Homosexuality ( if you have come out) or infertility issues could also be the what. Kyonki agar society ko pata chal gaya toh phir gossip circles mein agli gossip aapki hogi.

6. “Yeh kese kapde pehne hai” – For girls

Shorts, mini skirts crop tops off shoulder tops, short dresses, backless dresses wagehra wagehra………ke liye. Is any more explanation needed?

7. “Tumhari umar nahi yeh sab baatein karne ke liye,”

Basically don’t become progressive. Don’t question. Don’t talk about things that concern people. Talk only about your homework, your grades and about a random sitcom the whole family watches together.

8. ” pehle 12th karlo with 99.9999999999……….%, phir abcd graduation course, then xyz post graduation course then job then shaadi phir bacche, budaape mein khush rahoge.”

Basically prepare for the life which you will live after 60 years where there is no guarantee for happiness. Abhi khush mat rehna bas.

So these are some famous Indian parent dialogues………. and their meanings which I have understood in 15 years of my life.

But yaar koi samajta nahi,

Life is not a race … If you don’t run fast… you might be like a broken andaa but broken anda rehke khush ho toh phir kya problem.

Marriage- Not an excuse for rape

Well rapes are justified by various reasons . Like short clothes, late nights, characterless women, and now marriage.

Marriages in India have supposedly been made a consent for a sexual relationship between the two partners. On the wedding night, many brides are subjected to a forced physical relationship. Arey many brides may not even know that they are being forced.

Because how can you be “forced” in a marriage? Jab shaadi ka sabse important component hee bacche paida karna hai how can you say that a wife is raped by her husband?

Kese westernised concepts hai yaar yeh. Rape in marriage . Naah not possible. Legally it is not a crime(included in domestic violence). Socially it is a joke used in bollywood sex comedies or comedies in general because marital rape toh joke hai naa. Politicially toh bhool hee jao yaar . Politicians rape ke hee itne excuses bana dete hai. Marital rape ke liye toh matlab chod hee do.

Inse naa ho payega.

So again back to the point. Imagine a girl from a socially acceptable family (because of its high patriarchal standards) being wedded to obviously a guy she hasn’t ever seen save the wedding functions. Then going to her sasural having some small functions and then to her decorated room which she will share with a man whom she doesn’t know. Then she will have sex unwillingly but will not even know that she can have a choice to say no.

Because again weddings mean “yes”. Wedding se pehle yes nahi puchte. But wedding ke baad yes pehle hee maan lete hai.

And yes, marital rapes do occur in love marriages and against husbands as well.

So stop considering marriage as consent.

But kya kare( changing our and other’s mindsets) , patriarchy, naam toh suna hoga.

No More Men will be men

Disclaimer: This post does not intend to stereotype all men because that is a qualification that the society puts in its CV and not me. So society bashing starts in 3,2,1……

Okay. so the society has stereotyped men as creatures who view a particular sex with a disgusting view and mindset. And for the particular section of men who actually do it, the society has justified it and that too in 4 words.

Slow claps👏👏👏👏👏

So girls listen to me. If a man eyes you lustily, if he stares at your legs, if he clicks picks of your navel then its okay. He is a man . And of course. Men will be men. Woh tumhara mms bana sakte hai . Tumhe eve tease kar sakte hai. Sab kar sakte hai in the name of men will be men.

Yaar actually rapist will be rapist, molester will be molester, eve teaser will be eve teaser bolna naa thoda sa morally incorrect lagta hai. So men will be men bolo. Issey kya hoga ki saare aadmi bhi stereotype ho jayenge and again girls will get the message that they are objects. Very creative !!!

Kapdon ka toh suna tha as an excuse for rape. This is the next level.

But guess what!!! Sorry society( actually not sorry) but we aren’t really going to put up with this anymore. We will not be objectified any longer and any further. Toh yeh men will be men wali theory please dustbin mein phekdo. It has been disproved and disapproved by both men and women.

So society,

Sattar minute ki toh kya sattar second ki bhi zaroorath nahi bass inn 4 shabdo ko erase kardo dimaag se. Aur yeh sattar second tumse koi nahi cheen payega.

Arranged marriage conversation

Disclaimer: This conversation does not necessarily define each arranged marriage conversation and only seeks to talk about a bride , groom and 2 families who have abided by the customs of the society and therefore are misogynist, misogynist and more misogynist.

After the famous dialogue, hum log modern hai, hume koi problem nahi agar ladka aur ladki akele mein baath karna chahte hai,

The mother of the girl sends her daughter along with the ladka to the terrace giving them a time of 15 mins to say yes to the marriage. And yeah the time can be 30 minutes for modern families.

Ladka: Hi !!

Ladki: Hello with the fake sharm she has to put on as Indian brides are supposed to be shy.

Ladka: tum kaam kya karti ho?

Ladki: Woh I am a fashion designer.

Ladka: in mind(kaam poocha tha hobby nahi chalo accha hai ghar par zyaada dhyaan de payegi). I am an engineer.

Ladki: Oh( in mind isliye toh proposal iske ghar bheja tha)

Ladka: Tumhara koi boy friend reh chuka hai?

Ladki: ( 3 ) No no

Ladka: in mind( chalo virgin hai good hai pure biwi milegi tujhe)

Ladki: Aapki koi gf?

Ladka: (Kal hee toh break up kiya tha 4 year relationship se kyonki parents nahi maante) nahi nahi bilkul nahi .

Ladki: Any hobbies?

Ladka:( kathak dancing karta hoon youtube tutorials dekhkar) ummm yah cricket i love watching cricket

Ladki: Arey even i am a cricket fan who is your favourite player?

Ladka: Virat Kohli( aur koi naam toh pata nahi) tumhara?

Ladki: Sachin.

Ladka: oh any other hobby?

Ladki:(state level football player) Nahi nahi ( shaadi ke baad kaunsa cooking ke alaava meri aur koi hobby rahegi)

Fake smile fake smile andar dadi sun rahi hai.

Ladka: Okay point pe aata hoon. Do you know all household chores? I mean its fine if you are working. We are a modern family. But still ghar ka kaam… you know what i mean

Ladki: Yah yah i get it i know all household work vese do you mind telling me your salary?

Ladka: yah sure ..00000…..

Ladki: Oh nice( haan boldun pese toh hai bas akal nahi hai)

Fake smile alert

Ladka: okay so kya socha tumne?

Ladki: Sochna kya hai

Ladka: Haan chalte hai!

Ladki with her mom

Ladki: No he is so egoistic.

Ladka with his dad.

Ladka: No.She is so rude.

1 month baad.

Aap donon ka vivah sampan hua.

(Dowry transfer ✅ Bride transfer ✅ Baccha paida ✅)

And the fairytale ends.

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